Pollock

Last night I watched Pollock for the first time. I admit that I did not know a whole lot about the artist before, other than the fact that people make fun of his work...or they claim that anyone can do it. I disagree. Or maybe I agree that someone can, but why should they? Unless it is for an educational exercise.

After learning about him and his history, I think I have come to appreciate him and how he evolved, or maybe devolved. It seems like he found a higher self in how he worked with the paint. It is a different kind of abstract for sure. It does not look like anything. It is just a man whipping paint onto the canvas. Why not?

I still think I think like Pollock. He used liquid paints. He let the paint do what it wanted on the canvas. He likened it with chaos. He was close to nature. He was a drunk...I am not a drunk, but I have an addictive personality.

Gah, he was a fucking mess. But, I appreciate that kind of a mess. I know he was an Aquarius, but I bet his ascendant is Pisces. I would love to look at his birth chart. He was not for this world...or maybe he was not for his time. Or perhaps he was just in time.

I hate that the film he made about his process did him in and made him feel like a fraud - it seemed like that was his undoing, as self-doubt is with so many artists. Self-doubt should be beautiful because it keeps you honest, self-aware and humble. It makes you keep on trying and trying harder to achieve better.

What I appreciate most about him was letting go of structure. I think when you let go of so much of the structure of realism, surrealism, etc., painting is about energy and what is in the soul. There is something that pulls from a higher source within the artist...and maybe that is the chaos.