Cha$e

OK. I am watching this TV show called Cha$e on the Sci-fi channel. I have to say, I like it. It is fuckin' exciting. I dig the Secret Service like dudes, but dress those bitches like Zombies and that would be cooler.

I need a soma.

I am so inpired right now...

All I need is Zoey, my Flip, a laser pen and some techno music.

See more funny videos and Funny Videos at Today's Big Thing.

A New Calendar for 2009!

I just uploaded my new calendar for 2009. It is a selection of works from my Watercolor Experiments series. Most of these works will be shown in a show in March of 2009 at Image Optical Gallery in the Short North Gallery District here in Columbus, Ohio. I am excited to be able to exhibit the collection of works.

Personally, I know I have had a lot of artistic growth over the year, and I think the experiments show that growth. It definitely signifies my letting go and accepting fate, accepting the utter chaos that life brings, and then reeling it back into my realm of control. This decade has definitely tried to kick my ass, but I have made the best of life at every turn.

Hopefully the dA slideshow of the gallery wlll be available soon for non-beta testers and the public. It goes well with NIN, Ghosts, listening from IV to I.

The calendar is available for purchase here.

I will order a certain amount and have them available for purchase for $20.00. That way you can save on shipping. Unfortunately, I cannot afford to hand them out again this year.

I also plan to publish a portrait-oriented calendar with many of my old and new pen and ink sketches. It is for my friends who like to carry the thing around as a planner.

|=u(ki|\|g Zombies

Last year I was involved in a zombie attack at my work. Nothing serious. Currently, I am the closest thing to a zombie that I know of. I have the bones of the dead within me and they are reanimating (aka "grafting") as I write this. These bones are fortified by steel plates. So, this makes me a zombie robot. Well, people like to call me that. The hilarious thing is that I developed a character last year (developed as in drew) that was a zombie robot. I had no idea that one year later my fate would have such a coincidental twist. It's a coincidence and not irony, by the way. I have nothing against zombies or robots, much less robotic zombies.

When did my love of zombies begin? Very recently...up until two years ago, the thought of zombies freaked me out. A friend of mine had just published a book called Brainchild. He thought I would be interested in seeing it. I was not and I told him so. But, I bought it anyway (since it would be cool to own a book by a friend). Got it, read it, and had nightmares about it that night. But, I was hooked.

There was something about zombies that suddenly appealed to me. I then branched off to books released by the Permuted Press, Rebecca Brock stories, and Max Brooks books. I stared getting into Romero movies, Resident Evil movies, and all the others. I have even written some zombie stuff of my own.

It is very early in the planning, but there may be another zombie anthology by my friend. I am helping him out with this project. Although, based on our work schedules and my additional 2009 art schedule, I think it may 2010 before it happens.

About the picture: Undead vs Undead 2007. My friend Jared is a zombie. I am a vampire...well, sorceress vampire. Whatever. (I have lost 50 pounds since that picture was taken.)

Big In Japan - Wabi-Sabi

The other day an artist on dA (more about him and his project in another post) told me that I could be big in Japan. Hey, that's a band name....not a very good band, but I digress. So, this guy told me that I would be a hero in Japan because I am a disciple of wabi-sabi. I had no idea what that means and had to Google it, although, I have heard that my work has a lot of Asian influence. Which also makes sense because one of my artist friends from Scotland, whom I have a great deal of respect for, studied with an artist in Beijing.

Turns out, I probably am following wabi-sabi, even if I have not done so consciously. Wabi-Sabi is actually two separate beliefs that have been brought together recently. It is an ancient Buddhist philosophy that represents asymmetry, asperity, simplicity, modesty, intimacy, and suggest a natural process. I have always related my work to nature and often try to depict decay and imperfection. There is a beauty in that kind of natural process.

Here are a couple of links to study, if you want:
What is Wabi - Sabi?
Wabi Sabi on Wikipedia

Soup Spell

Okay, I have this weird and freakish ability to change the properties of soup...like a creamy potato or a creamy broccoli. I freaked my husband out tonight because I proved that I could thin soup just by being near it. I was eating mine and told him what happens. He said it was just my soup. His soup (the same soup) was still thick. So he traded me.

Within a minute his soup, too, was like water. He was weirded out by it.
It is a bummer because I'll be enjoying a thick, creamy soup and within moments it is thin as water. I have had this "ability" for years. I worked with a woman years back who watched me do it and told me that I was a natural witch. I'm not sure if I believe in all of that or not, but witches are suppose to be able to control the elements, right? Who knows. I am not sure what good it is...

But there must be a scientific reason as to why this happens.

Interview

Recently, I was interviewed by Andrei Pavel for Romania's Urban Arts Channel. You can check out that interview here.

Blue!!!!!!

Our state is blue!!!!!!!!!

Listening to fireworks go off in the distance. It is a time for celebration.

Barack My Vote

I was telling my husband this evening that this is the fifth presidential election that I have voted in, and I have never been so excited to vote for a person. I voted for Clinton the second time around, but my enthusiasm for him does not compare to the absolute hope and excitement I feel about voting for Obama. I believe this man can bring great change in our nation. I want to feel proud to be an American again and I think he can inspire change and lead us in a better direction. We need this country to be about the people and for the people. Not for the oil companies. Not for the drug companies. Not for the insurance companies. Corporate greed has poisoned this place. I am tired of greedy men and waring men. It is time to not be lulled by these entities and scared into needless war and suffering. I hope you get out there and vote for Barack!

Here is a little flash back with the Wazzzzup!!!!! commercial and how the guys have fared 8 years into the Bush administration. I hope what you see at the end of it is what we see tomorrow and hopefully before midnight!!

An Unwelcome Guest

My kitten was not at all happy with his little visitor taking up space on his window ledge and blocking the sun.

Show at Haiku - July 2009

I have a second solo show for 2009, in July. This one is at Haiku in Columbus' Short North Gallery District. I am very excited. Except that I accidentally closed the car door on this piece. Gah! I need to fix the thing now.

Thank You Scarlet

One month and five days ago I had a little surgery on my neck. I had two levels of my cervical spine removed and replaced with cadaver bones and metal plates. I have to tell you, it has been an experience. I am healing up fast and well.

One of my first adventures out of the house was when I drove to meet some friends for a birthday lunch. My friend, who is a little goth (not the emo kind, more like the true kind: in spirit), asked me if I had the life story of the person who donated my bones. Nah, when a person donates bones and skin, they go to a bank. It is not quite like organs (hearts, livers, kidneys) where they track them and the match has to be more concise. With bones and skin, the process does not have as high of a risk of rejection as vital organs.

But, I still think about the fact that some person died and was kind enough to leave their parts and pieces for people like me to use. So, I named that unknown person Scarlet.

Why Scarlet? Because I have had an attraction to red since the surgery. I even died my hair red. I am not sure how much of a fake identity I want to develop past that point, so we will leave it at that.

...

The Governor in Red Leather

The Governor in Red Leather...the one with $150,000 make-overs, and $17,000 per diems, when so many "Joe-Six Packs" and "Susie Soccer Moms" (uh, the fem version may not be correct...I usually quit listening after the first grossly inaccurate blanket description) wish they had an extra $17 for their meager per diem...

That governor? Why yes. And to not be outdone, McCain found his own "Joe Six pack" in "Joe the Plumber". But that is an actual man...was Joe prepared to face the kind of scrutiny he has faced as he was being used as McCain's patsy? Yeah, he is a patsy. Fuck, most Americans are, aren't they? Well, I hope it is more like they were! We have 10 more days to get enough people to wake up and realize that if they do own that descriptor, "Joe the Plumber", they are, in fact, a very average American. Republicans do not want to give you tax breaks. They want you to vote them in so they can get the tax breaks and break the rules for their rich and powerful friends. They want to continue to poison America with their greed. Oh, they will throw you a bone every once in a while and give you enough to buy a fucking TV, or invest in their corporations, once they realize they need to reel you back in. But remember to add that to your income on your next return.

Orange Coke

Okay, I just sent the following message to Coke.com. Hopefully they will do it...
"Hello. I wanted to email an idea I have for a Diet Coke flavor. Recently, when I am at Pei Wei, I add oranges to my diet coke, and it is delicious. If you could come up with an orange flavor diet coke, that would be awesome. I am sure regular Coke would be great, too, but I am diabetic. Thanks for your time."

I guess I could buy oranges and diet coke and do it myself, but that's a pain in the ass.

Update: I got an email back from Coke telling me that they cannot and will not take my suggestion because of a bunch of corporate BS that completely gets them out of ever paying me for making a suggestion. I didn't want to be paid. I wanted them to get their asses busy and make some orange Coke.

Large Impact Simulation Video

You know what bums me out about this? If it is possible to have an underground society if something like this happened, I bet they would actually save people like Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, and Britney Spears. Actually, who cares? Living underground for the rest of your life would suck anyway.

Are We Atill Married?

I just watched this sober...later on I will take a vicodin and see if I like it more...

Rusted World - WIP

I just finished varnishing Rusted Worlds and will assemble the piece later on today. I am excited to see the finished product. I am saving it for the March show.

Here is a little abstract photo of step two in my process on one of the blocks in this piece:

Bought some art today...

Well, yesterday. I bought a piece by Justin Gray at Agora V.

Here is his statement:
"My working process is derived from a ceramics firing process called pit firing where the artist builds a fire on top of his work and lets the smoke leave it's marks. This is precisely what I do, not on clay work, but instead on light weight panels."

Fire and smoke!! That completely rocks. The reason I bought the work was because it had such a tactile look. I wanted so bad to touch the thing to feel what it was made of. Jared and I thought it was made of fabric, but it was hard. Turns out, it is ceramic fired board. Very nice.
I am happy I bought it. It has a happy new home now.

Traditional Marriage Is An Antiquated Notion

I think instead of trying to legalize gay marriage, we should reexamine marriage in its entirety, and change the paradigm about what marriage really is in respect to the law and government. I believe that marriage, as we know it, is an antiquated notion in our society. If you take the romanticism out of the arrangement, what you have is truly a business arrangement and a partnership. This business arrangement and partnership is based on a mutual trust and respect, with love as a motivation. This does not and should not have to be held to the beliefs of a faction of society that only believes that it is exclusively a union between a man and a woman. It should be a union between any two people who choose to pursue it. The religious aspects of the union should be completely removed from the process as far as the legal part of it is concerned. If a couple chooses to have their marriage "blessed" my their church in a traditional marriage ceremony, then that would be a completely separate and private arrangement.

Mmmm Sonic Youth in a Vicodin Haze

I am so not bored right now. Actually, I am doing pretty well. Listening the Children of Men soundtrack, which is quite incredible, by the way. Now the Sonic Youth song which I have been into lately is a cover of The Carpenters song Superstar, and is not on that soundtrack. Yeah, The Carpenters. I often get into those tribute albums and may go back and buy the whole thing. It is pretty awesome.

So, I have been high for days now. I am to a certain degree pretty much high all the time. I've lost 10 pounds now. I am in the next size down in a lot of things, so I have bought new clothes for when I return to work. Mostly red. Unfortunately I am the fattest person I know, so I'll just give the massive pile of giant clothes that are now on the floor of the extra bedroom to Goodwill or the Kidney Foundation.

I have not been as into my art as I thought I would be. I get distracted quick as fuck. Ha...what does that mean?? Depends on the guy, I guess.

Bored Now

OMG. I am so fucking bored I am going out of my mind.

Another Great One

Assemblage Versus The Art of Cooking

Back a few years ago when I was in one of many marketing classes, specifically Marketing Behavior, I learned something shocking about myself. I was not actually a cook. Not that I was fooling myself into thinking I was some sort of chef, but I did have a few signature dishes I prepared that I could use to work my way into the hearts of men, so to speak. Turns out, cooks are very rare now days. Who has time today to not be an assembler, versus a cook or a chef? There is just way too much stuff to do.

So, if you look up "assemblage" in it's relation to art, you know that it truly is an art in itself. <More here on that> Either with assemblage art or assemblage cooking, you can make a really awesome thing, or you could really fuck it up. You still have to know how to "cook"...or design something.

Assemblage Chili...or just Chili

º 2 lbs of ground beef (fry it up and drain the grease)
º 1 onion all chopped up
º 1 can of Progresso Basil Tomato Soup
º 2 12 oz cans of diced tomatos
º 1 12 oz can of vegetarian baked beans (I like them better than kidney beans. Why vegetarian? They have less sugar.)
º 1 tbsp garlic salt
º 1/4 cup dried onion
º 1 tsp cayenne pepper (whoa...more if you want to make it freakin' HOT!!!!)

Directions: Cook the hamburger and drain the grease. Add the onion. Add everything else. Let it cook and simmer for a couple hours. Server it with some crackers and sour cream. Maybe some cheese.

Maybe you'll go mad and your junk'll rot off...

Another SNL Palin clip

Nothing to add...

Fugue Attack

I use to have this friend who insisted that one day I would have a massive fugue attack and then end up in the Florida Keys as a professional alligator wrestler. I must say that some days I think this is not beyond the realm of possibility. Although, I may wrestle crocodiles instead. Or kittens.

The Best Laid Plans...

For all of the good planning and willingness to make a perfect product, shit happens. Human error. Man interacting with his environment and having to succumb to its hapless whims.
Did the man see the leaf and think, "you know, I can only do so much"? Or was he in a hurry and just did not care? Or did it blow in at the last moment and he was completely unaware? Or, my favorite choice, did he just let it happen because he knew the results would yield a perfect outline of a leaf that will live on until the next painter comes along? A little piece of chaos.

The Lights Are Out But Somebody's Home

Well, it is day three without power. I have a feeling I am going to have to figure out what batteries this lantern takes pretty soon.

Earlier we had pizza by candlelight. How romantic.

We just dumped nearly every bit of food we had in the fridge and freezer. That was a little depressing. The freezer stuff was gross. We have a shelf with stuff that may not stink if we wait. We will dump that later.

I am adapting surprisingly well. Although, I am convinced that having this access to the net and means to charge my electronic essentials means a lot. I will need to do laundry soon, though.

Prediction: Thursday night for the power.

On The News

On the news...well, my house is on the news. And my cars. I am not sure which network. They are talking about the power outage from Hurrican Ike. Yes, we has a hurricane in Central Ohio, no less. Category 1, and that is enough for me. The ironic thing is that we sent 50% of our electric crews to TX for Ike, So now we have no power. Went out at 3pm yesterday. Thank goodness for gas. Atleast I can take a hot shower. Plus, I am charging stuff at friends houses and work, and have internet access via the iPhone!
I also have a kick-ass battery lantern. Love it!

So, it is not so bad.

Joe and I were doing unspeakable things during the broadcast, by the way. lol.

SNL - Palin and Clinton

OK, this is hilarious...and by the way, if you do not just assume you know what it means, a "flerg" is something that gives a man a flaccid penis.

Love it! "In conclusion, I invite the media to grow a pair. And if you cannot, I will lend you mine."

Now that is fucking priceless.

By the way, Tina Fey is Palin's twin - nothing against Fey!

OMG .... itza Black Hole!!!!!

Okay, I know it is only the first part of the experiment at CERN, and we will not know if they are creating earth-consuming black holes until October, but this guy has a funny take on people's reactions....

Sour Kraut Balls

Mmmmmm. I hate sour kraut, but I loves me some sour kraut balls....here is the recipe:

Preheat oven to 350º.

Brown 1 lb. Bob Evans Sausage (use regular and drain the grease)
Drain a 12 oz jar of Vlasic sour kraut. (drain well)

Mix the browned sausage and sour kraut in a bowl with 1 package of cream cheese.

Roll them into ballz...should make around 20 to 30 I think, depending on how big you like your balls.

Roll them in bread crumbs.

Place them on a cookie sheet and bake for 20 minutes.

Lipstick

You can put lipstick on a pig, but Sarah Palin is still a crazy bitch. Specifically a pitbull. Hey, she said it.

I am so sick of politics right now. It is quite sad that America will keep the Republicans in office when it is obvious they are destroying this country. When he chose Palin I thought, what a ploy! Who in the hell is going to fall for that?? Well, I should have known better. I think we need to reevaluate who gets to vote in this country. There should be an IQ test.

Numbers...